Staircase
by The Jackalope
Summary: Roxas didn't think that accepting something like a drink would end him up like this. On this staircase with this guy he didn't know. Where was Axel when he needed him? [AkuRoku Oneshot]


**Staircase**

_The Jackalope_

* * *

Roxas was starting to regret ever giving into Demyx's perfected puppy-dog look when the older boy had asked him to come to his beach party. It wasn't so much a beach party- Demyx's house was on the coast, so it was a house party that spilled out onto the sand. Whatever. A party was a party. 

Roxas sat awkwardly on the stairs, alone. The music was blasting so loud he could literally see the large speakers vibrating, and it was late into the evening, and pretty much everyone was drunk by now. It hadn't been so bad when he had first gotten here- he had chatted with Demyx, but as soon as Zexion showed up he started to get ignored, and then once Xigbar appeared he was forcibly ejected from the couch. He scowled, tapping his foot on the stair. He should probably go home. But Axel had been invited to this party too, so maybe he was going to show up soon- maybe he was already here, picking up some girl- the very thought made Roxas's scowl. He wasn't entirely sure why though. He was possessive of his friend for some reason.

He was shaken out of his thoughts when a shadow fell over him- in front of him, a smiling teen held out a drink to him, "Here."

Blinking, Roxas was shaken out of his thoughts as he reached up, taking the glass without thinking, "Uh- thanks."

He took a sip, looking up to observe the older teen- on second glance, he realized he might have even been a young adult, maybe 19 or 20. He had long, light-brown hair parted in the middle and a bit of a nerdish look about him. He looked out of place, at the very least- he should have been doing overtime in the chemistry labs at school, not at Demyx's beach party.

"I'm Vexen." The brunette man extended out one arm, the other resting at his side with his index finger rubbing against his thumb in a nervous habit. There was an odd glint in the man's eyes- one that Roxas couldn't honestly identify- although the strange little half-smile that Vexen was giving him was a bit unnerving.

"Roxas," he stuck out his hand, shaking the proffered one, pulling away quickly. The man's hand was _freezing_ and slightly clammy. Roxas pressed his hand up against his stomach casually, wanting to wipe it but not wanting to seem rude, either.

Vexen took a step closer to the blonde boy. "How old are you? You look a bit young to be here." The man muttered, reaching out icy fingers underneath of Roxas's chin and tilting it up. "You're a very pretty child though." He continued softly, face breaking into a smile.

"E-eighteen," Roxas stuttered quickly- too quickly. The pretty child comment threw him off, but he figured that social recluses didn't know how to behave in public. Or something like that. For some reason, he didn't feel the need to react violently, like how he usually would have... He was only sixteen, but Demyx was twenty one, and he wasn't sure if his friend would appreciate it if news got around that he, a college student, was still hanging out a high school kid.

"You?" he quickly tried to move the conversation, just in case his lie was transparent.

"Twenty three- you're a freshman, I'm assuming?" Vexen nearly cooed, his hand trailing from under Roxas's chin to stroke his cheek for a moment before he took a seat on the stairs beside the blonde boy.

"Uh... uhm... yeah," _what the hell?_ Roxas knew he should have shied away the first time the man's fingers touched his chin, and even now as his hand moved to stroke his cheek completely he just... didn't seem to care. He knew he should have cared, but to care just seemed to require so much more effort than it was really worth.

Taking another sip from his drink, he half hid behind the glass, "You in college too?"

Vexen hummed, an odd little quirk coming to his lips as he watched Roxas take another drink before his eyes darted up to gaze at the younger boy's face. "Yes. I'm planning to become a chemist once I graduate with my master's degree." Vexen's hand trailed over to land onto Roxas's knee. "What about you?"

"Masters, huh?" Roxas placed the glass down- it was half finished, and he was feeling a bit hazy. He didn't drink often, what did he just have? He thought he'd be able to handle his drink more than this. He swayed a little, and suddenly Vexen's shoulder looked rather comfortable.

So without a second thought, he dropped his head there, eyes half lidded as a hand slid from his knee upwards, down his thigh. He forgot to reply to Vexen's question.

"Mhmmm," Vexen shifted, lips pressing softly against Roxas's head as his hand crawled up the blonde's leg to rest on his hip, tugging Roxas into his lap. "You look a bit hot in that jacket... let me help you out of it..." The brunette's hands slowly began to unzip the white jacket that Roxas had on, slipping icy fingers inside to slowly tug it off, mouth pressing a cold kiss to Roxas's flushed cheek.

With a weak mumbling of consent, Roxas's gaze fell lazily over the room behind them, the loud music and yelled conversations suddenly becoming rather distant. Cold fingers were trailing along his arms, and his jacket dropped to the step they were sitting on, and his cheek suddenly felt really clammy and cold and it took him several moments to realize it was because Vexen had kissed him.

Frowning, he knew something was wrong with this situation, but he really didn't know what he was meant to protest against. He felt weak, like his limbs were too heavy to move, but at the same time they felt feather light as if they weren't there anymore.

Vexen's hands rested upon Roxas's thin hips as his lips trailed butterfly kisses across a fair cheek until his mouth enclosed over the blonde's, tugging the younger male's small body up against his. Shivers jerked up Roxas's spine as Vexen kissed him. How did that happen so quickly? This was wrong. So _wrong, _

"Like a glass doll. So fair," Vexen murmured against pliant lips, grinning despite himself. Fuck, this was Roxas's first kiss. He was on some staircase with some weird guy at Demyx's party and--

Finally his body seemed to be listening to him, and although his movements were sluggish, Roxas brought his hands up, pushing against Vexen- why were his arms so heavy? Where was his jacket? Wasn't he wearing it a moment ago? He pushed in vain against Vexen's immobile body, and he felt like he was putting all his very being into the shove, yet it came out as nothing, just a mere touch to the man's chest.

Vexen's lips twisted into a smile, pulling his mouth from Roxas's to ghost it over the effeminate jaw line. "Struggling is so futile, my little doll. A chemist always knows how to make the best drugs. You won't be able to fight back- or even move your body properly for the next hour. And after that- you'll be far too aroused to care what I'm going to do to you," The man murmured, his fingers moving to slide up Roxas's black t-shirt, dancing along the flat abdomen as he returned his thin lips to the teen's mouth, kissing him once more, a delighted noise escaping him the moment the blonde child in his arms began to squirm.

Roxas wanted so bad to get away from the hands that were touching him, violating him, going places only his best friend had gone in his dreams- and he clenched his eyes shut tightly, wishing that the man's hands could at least be warm, that he could at least pretend that he was on this staircase with Axel.

"That's perfect," Vexen whispered, pulling away and kissing down Roxas's jaw line to his neck, where he buried his face. The man's fingers trailed down from the blonde's stomach, his arousal pressing quite evidently into Roxas's thigh as nimble, icy fingers began fiddling with the button of Roxas's pants. "So well behaved..." Vexen murmured into Roxas's throat, tongue darting out to run along the pale column until he reached Roxas's ear- where he bit down gently on the lobe. He pulled the button apart, and his fingers slowly tugged at the zipper.

Roxas breathed the redhead's name in a small whimper, fingers clutching the corner of the stair, arms fallen back from trying to push against Vexen. It was no use. His body wouldn't listen, and even when it did he couldn't do anything. This had to be some sort of nightmare.

Vexen's lips released Roxas's ear, tugging at his pants and lifting the blonde up in his lap for a moment to slip them off. "Axel... yes… I've heard of him before. Demyx said he wouldn't be coming to the party- ditched it," Vexen smiled that same, sickening smile at Roxas, rocking his hips to show the blonde that he was already hard, and wanting. "It will only be a matter of time before the drugs kick in," he muttered, fingers tracing the elastic of Roxas's boxers.

And all Roxas could do as tears brimmed his eyelashes, was repeat Axel's name, voice cracking, his heart breaking.

---

Axel, as it was- was currently making his way down the road to where blaring music and drunken laughter echoed from the farthest house on the block. Roxas, apparently, had gone to Demyx's party- which Axel had discovered upon visiting Roxas's uncle Sora's house and discovering that the blonde boy wasn't there.

The lanky teen paused at the front of Demyx's house, contemplating on whether or not he should knock, before he shrugged, twisted the doorknob, and opened it. There were a few people around, most of them passed out. He approached the couch to see something he'd never wanted to see in his life. His college buddies, Demyx, Xigbar, and Zexion, were currently together on Demyx's couch. At the very bottom, Zexion lie with both Demyx's weight and Xigbar's atop of him. Demyx's mouth was latched onto the violet-haired man's, kissing him wildly. Xigbar was bent over behind Demyx, flush back to stomach, lips nipping at an exposed column of Demyx's shoulder with one hand down the front of the blonde's pants. The two of them were rocking back and forth, with heated gasps escaping as Zexion let loose a moan.

Swearing, Axel turned around- on second thought, he'd check outside first- and look for some bleach for his eyes.

-

Roxas's heart dropped to his stomach the moment Vexen confirmed his suspicions that Axel had ditched the party. This was it- everyone else was too wasted by now to think of helping him, and he knew that Demyx would be too preoccupied for the next few hours...

He choked back a sob. Vexen had taken such pride in the drug he had slipped into Roxas's drink that he had told the boy several times the different stages of effects. Soon it would act as an aphrodisiac. That was what he feared most- what if he suddenly _wanted_ to be with this creep- what if those cold, biting fingers suddenly became attractive? He'd never be able to look at himself in the mirror again, knowing he complied willingly to whatever they were about to do.

Vexen grinned, moving his head up back to Roxas's face as one hand slipped inside of the blonde's boxers, grasping the limp flesh there as a cold tongue darted out to lick the tears that had slipped from oceanic eyes, "Precious," He muttered with a grin, lifting the body atop his lap and manuvering so that Roxas was underneath of him on the stairs, with Vexen's slightly larger frame hovering above.

-

_Huh._ _Well. Roxas wasn't outside..._ Axel wandered back into the house- stepping over Luxord's unconscious body and then wandering to the center of the house and thinking for a moment. Maybe he was upstairs? With that in mind, Axel turned and approached the stairwell, hand on the banister and glancing up to see two bodies blocking his path a little ways up. For a moment, he contemplated leaving them but then he recognized the sneakers of the one on bottom. Roxas's favorite sneakers- ones that Axel had bought him for his birthday last year, with the little chakram designs on the soles.

"Roxas?" Axel called out, eyes narrowing when the body atop his companion froze.

"Axel-" the blonde gasped out as Vexen pulled back from his mouth, and his voice was unusually high, because he knew that tears were still streaming down his face, and he repeated his friend's name, louder this time, in disbelief, "Axel?!"

He couldn't see around Vexen- the man was blocking his view. Oh god, don't let this be a cruel joke...

"Roxas!" Axel hurried up the stairs as Vexen scrambled off of the blonde boy. The sandy- haired man had barely turned around when Axel's fist shot out, connecting with the man's nose. "You fucker!" Axel snarled, both arms snapping forth to grab him by the front of his coat and throw him down the stairs.

Axel leapt off after him when Vexen tried to scramper away, grasping the man by the hair and lifting him up- ignoring the squealing pleas from Vexen as the redhead's fist connected once more with his face before Axel dragged him through the house and to the front door.

With an angry roar, Vexen was thrown out onto the sidewalk.

"Don't you _ever_ show your fucking face around here again," Axel spat, slamming the door so harshly that a portrait rocked and fell to the ground with a shatter. Axel ignored it, however, his eyes going wide before he whirled around and all but ran back to the stairs, hopping the steps two by two until he knelt down next to Roxas, hands hovering over the blonde, panic in his eyes, "Roxas- oh god, Roxas, are you alright?"

Breath hitching in his throat, the blonde reached forward, touching Axel's cheek- it really was him. How was this possible...? How did Axel come for him every time? His shoulders shook and he bowed his head, his hand warming, feeling so much better- _fixed_.

He couldn't bring himself to speak, and his hand dropped down to Axel's collar, gripping it gently, wanting desperately to cling to him but not having the energy to lift himself- one of the effects of the drug. His pants sat around his thighs and his jacket was a few steps down and all he wanted to do right now was curl up and be swallowed up by the rough carpet of the stairs that dug into the small of his back and his bare legs.

"Oh man, Roxas... I'm so sorry," Axel breathed out, lurching forward and grabbing the blonde tightly- crushing Roxas's body up against his in a strong hug. His own thin frame was trembling- and he felt Roxas's shaking just as badly, if not worse. "I'm so sorry."

Sucking in a breath against Axel's neck, the blonde focused heavily on lifting his arms around his waist, returning the embrace as much as he could. Axel just seemed to generate heat and even as he sat there half naked he felt so comfortable in his friend's arms that almost felt he could forget about what just happened...

But his lips were frozen- his tongue was like ice. And down his chest, down past the line of his boxers...

Roxas choked on another sob, gripping Axel's shirt tightly as he spoke into the man's neck- but the music was too loud, and Roxas's voice was too quiet, especially when muffled. He'd never be heard.

Roxas's arms lifted so slowly, that Axel's brows furrowed, wanting to pull back to examine the blonde, until he spotted a discarded, half empty cup just two steps above. His eyes narrowed, "Roxas... did you drink anything that he gave you? Did he drug you?" Axel pulled away to give Roxas's body a quick once-over before staring up into hazy blue eyes. "Oh god he did, didn't he?"

Roxas's reply was delayed nod, and he pulled his arms back from Axel, hugging his stomach and clutching at his shirt tightly as he tried to curl himself up into a ball. He was so stupid- he should have known... But he didn't even have suspicions until it was too late.

Axel's eyes were filled with sorrow and regret, and long, thin arms reached out to wrap around Roxas's curled body, lifting him against his chest. "I'm going to take you home- we'll go to my house, since it's closer," Axel's free hand tugged at Roxas's pants to replace them back on the blonde's body. Zipping them, but leaving the button undone, Axel seated Roxas in his lap before sliding his hands under the blonde's bottom and lifting Roxas almost like a child, making sure to pick up the discarded jacket on his way down the stairs. They passed the couch (where Xigbar and Demyx were without their pants, and the blonde man was currently attempting to remove Zexion's as Xigbar's hands rubbed at Demyx's exposed backside) and to the door. Axel opened it, peering outside to make sure that there was no sign of Vexen before hoisting Roxas further in his grasp and making his way down the street.

Clutching tightly to Axel, Roxas was glad once they were outside, the darkness and silence helping him calm down just a little. He took slow, steady breaths, his heart racing against Axel's chest, arms loosely around the tall boy's neck as he was carried through lamp lit streets.

Quietly, he spoke to him, now that he could be heard, "I'm sorry."

Axel peered down at the bundle in his arms, his gaze becoming one filled with sorrow. "I'm the one who should be sorry, Rox... I wasn't there for you." He muttered, tilting his head down to rest it atop a tuft of blonde hair before picking up his pace. His dorm wasn't too far off, only a block away- though Roxas's body was starting to get heavy. He smiled down at the blonde when they turned onto his street. "We'll be there soon- don't worry," he reassured, feeling his heart break at the way Roxas just lay in his arms, limp, and without any energy.

"Really, I'm... I shouldn't have... I..." he tried again, but the words just wouldn't come out as Axel carried him up the stairs to his dorm. He loved Axel's dorm- it was his home away from home, and he probably spent more time there than he did in his own room.Roxas's hand slipped down from Axel's back to his bicep, which he clutched onto gently as they came to the front door.

Axel shifted Roxas's weight to one arm to rummage in his pocket, pulling out his keys and unlocking the door, opening it and stepping inside before shutting it, "You shouldn't have let me ditch that party," Axel muttered, carrying Roxas across the dorm room and into his bedroom, placing the blonde gently on the bed, "Are you... alright?" He asked gently, placing long fingers onto Roxas's shoulders with worried eyes. "Does anywhere hurt? Do you know what kind of drug he gave you?"

"I shouldn't have gone," Roxas murmured, unable to meet Axel's gaze, eyes planted firmly on the floor, "And... he told me," he swallowed thickly, wanting to lick his dry lips but not wanting to taste Vexen on him anymore than he already did. He spoke slowly and quietly, "He made it himself- first it makes me weak and sluggish... and then eventually it works as an aphrodisiac... at least, that's what he was suggesting..." shoulders hunched, he head dropped, and he clenched his eyes shut tightly, "I'm such an idiot."

"No- you're not an idiot!" Axel intervened, pulling Roxas into his chest. "And if it does do that- I'll be here for you. I'll… I'll make it up to you- it's my fault that drug is in your system, because I wasn't there for you," Axel pulled away, biting down on his lip. "You're my best friend, Roxas- and I love you," he'd spoken the words without thinking- and once he had, the redhead flushed and looked away.

A small, almost bitter laugh left Roxas's lips. How he'd dreamed of those words in a romantic context- and here they were, a simple "I love my best friend!" moment.

"He took my first kiss," this was so ironic- everything seemed to come too late, "and..." he doubled over, covering his mouth with a hand. The mere thought of it made him feel sick. He switched off his mind at the time, but now. Axel turned back around, using his hands to steady the blonde. "It's alright, Roxas..."

It took a moment, but an odd look crossed the redhead's face before he spoke again. "First k- Roxas... _I _was your first kiss... remember?" He thought it odd that the blonde hadn't- hell, Axel had cherished that moment in his mind for all these years, and to have Roxas forget it so easily was even more proof that the blonde didn't reciprocate his feelings... as if the chuckle had been bad enough.

"Of course I remember that- we were ten. But that was only because I had ice cream on my mouth--" he winced, hands moving up to grasp the ones on his shoulders gently, "You didn't shove your tongue into my mouth then, did you?" another sour laugh left him, "You didn't start touching me, trying to jerk me off then, did you?"

His voice had risen, and suddenly it dropped, and he panted, having worked himself up unintentionally. Squeezing his eyes shut, he sucked in a breath shakily, "You know, the whole time, I wished it was you."

Axel froze, hands clenching and un-clenching as he stared at Roxas with something akin to utter shock. "I-... yh... you did?" He breathed out.

"Mmhmm," shifting on the bed, Roxas felt an overwhelming sense of bravery and boldness building inside of him. He looked up at Axel through his lashes, fingers spreading out against the blanket underneath him, "The entire time... I tried closing my eyes, imagining it was you, but-"

He cut himself off, watching Axel curiously for a moment, before blurting out suddenly, "Kiss me."

Axel stopped breathing for exactly two seconds before he barely gave Roxas a nod, leaning forward at the same time he pulled Roxas towards himself until their lips met somewhere in the middle in a soft kiss that was was warm- how Roxas had imagined and hoped it would be. A relieved, happy sigh escaped into the kiss as he brought his arms up around the other's neck, his energy slowly returning to him. Although this was technically his second, he never reciprocated the first one, and so clumsily he pressed his lips up against the redhead's.

Breaking the kiss for a moment, he fell back against Axel's bed, waiting for the redhead to follow him. Axel couldn't even think straight to realize that the aftereffects of the drugs might have been kicking into Roxas's system. He followed the retreating mouth, climbing onto the bed so that he straddled Roxas's chest, using his arms to hoist Roxas completely onto the bed until Axel's bottom was seated comfortably on narrow hips. His mouth descended once more, pressing against Roxas's lips insistently, fingers sliding into blonde locks of hair.

Squirming underneath his best friend, Roxas let out a soft, broken moan, arching upwards- unable to move far with Axel sitting on top of him. His pants were probably already tight enough as they were- but now, with the college freshman on top of him as well...

"Please," he gasped into the kiss, hands trailing up and into Axel's hair- it was something he always wanted to do, and so he did it as friends- but from this angle, in this situation, it was something entirely different. He finished his murmur into another kiss, "Please, Axel- fix me."

"How?" Axel whispered against Roxas's lips before he littered Roxas's mouth with chaste kisses, his breath heated, with hands roaming along Roxas's body before they toyed with the hem of the blonde's shirt, lifting it to expose a taut, flat belly that Axel's fingers danced along whilst pushing up the bothersome t-shirt._ He shouldn't be doing this- but he couldn't stop himself, not after having held back for so long._

"Like th--" squirming underneath Axel's hands, Roxas gasped out loud, bringing him back down for another kiss, "Just... just like this. I... need to replace my memories with you," he licked his lips, moistening them as he looked up and met Axel's gaze. His lips tasted warm now and he felt so much more at ease.

"Consider it done," Axel whispered, tongue flitting out against the blonde's mouth before he leaned in, slipping it past parted lips to taste Roxas. His hands were rubbing against the blonde's chest, one thumb brushing a hardening nipple as the other followed suit, his long fingers holding Roxas's body just a fraction off of the bed and increasing the friction between them. Axel felt himself heat up and he put his guilt on the back-burner as Roxas let out a low moan.

Fingers leaving Axel's hair, Roxas dug his elbows into the mattress as he arched himself back up against his friend, mouth open and willing, tongue darting out to meet Axel's. He had no idea where his usual shy nature had gone- but really, at the moment, he didn't care. He broke the kiss with a small whine as Axel's warm fingertips teased his chest, and his heart thundered underneath the pale hand.

"Roxas... I love you." Axel muttered, claiming the blonde's mouth once more tongue moving to slide along the roof of Roxas's mouth before twining around the younger teen's own tongue. His hips began to rock, hoping to alleviate some of the tension building there as his hands teased at the two hardened nubs beneath his calloused thumbs..

Had Roxas not been high on aphrodisiacs, he probably would have stopped mid kiss to stare at Axel in shock, and then proceed to blush and stutter a reply- but the problem was that he _was_ suffering the after effects of the spiked drink he had consumed not too long ago. And so all he could do was moan loudly into their kiss as Axel grinded their hips together and touched him _all over_. This was exactly what he needed right now, and he loved it.

The moan that escaped Roxas's throat sent vibrations of pleasure through their tongues and into Axel's mouth, earning a gasp from the redhead, his hips dropping down onto Roxas's arched body, groaning at the temporary release that resulted from the friction. It wasn't enough though- the heat in him was building up too fast, and he slipped his hands to divulge Roxas of his shirt, breaking their kiss for only a second before diving back in until his mouth trailed down Roxas cheek, leaving nips and kisses until he reached the blonde's collarbone, licking it before latching his mouth onto the cool flesh and sucking gently, his hands fiddling with the zipper if his own jacket- it was getting far too hot. He tugged the offending article of clothing before giving up- his hands returned to Roxas's body to roam the expanse of the smaller boy's torso with vigor.

Roxas brought his fingers up and undid the boy's jacket for him, slipping it off and letting it drop to the side of the bed. Various gasps, moans and whines escaped his mouth as the redhead ravished him and grinded their hips together. Spreading his legs while arching back up against him, Roxas found himself in a whole new position against Axel, and he slid his body up against his, silently begging for more friction between them.

Axel couldn't help it- lips breaking off from where they were making a fresh hickey on Roxas's neck, he panted for air, nimble fingers tugging insistently at Roxas's jeans, undoing the fly before sitting back just enough to pull Roxas's pants off so that he could place a large hand over the throbbing heat that resided in the blonde's boxers, his palm kneading gently and his mouth reaching out in search of Roxas's, their lips crashing together in an almost wild frenzy, gasps and moans filling the room. A long moan released itself from Roxas's throat as he tossed his head back, arching up as he rubbed himself up against Axel's hand, desperate for more contact. "R-roxas..." Axel panted, before his mouth was once again occupied.

Roxas pressed the side of his face into the blanket below him, panting and strangling out frequent pleas for something he didn't know between gasps for air and more groans of pleasure- this was better than anything he had ever experienced in his dreams.

Axel moved his mouth to trail kisses along the throat that Roxas had suddenly exposed to the redhead. Roxas was a sight to behold- flushed and writhing, his hair disheveled and lips swollen, with apparent arousal clouding his gorgeous azure eyes. Axel had to withhold a low growl, nipping at Roxas's neck. His hand was hot, even hotter with the blonde's aching member beneath it- separated only by the cloth of Roxas's boxers- ones that were beginning to get in the way. Axel's fingers slid up, tugging down those bothersome underclothes and finally releasing the blonde's throbbing erection. Axel hissed against the crook of Roxas's neck, his hand wrapping about the younger teen's heat and slowly stroking it. "Is this what you want?" He asked, his voice husky and thick with arousal.

"Uhn- yeehh---ess..." hands shooting up to Axel's shoulders, Roxas's fingers clutched at his best friend tightly, and his heart felt like it was about to explode in his chest- all the times he had touched himself, alone in bed, thinking about Axel- it was never like this. Even that time when Axel had been sleeping over, and he watched the sleeping redhead as he jerked off hadn't been anything like this (although it had been the best fucking wank he'd had, although he felt a bit paranoid afterwards that Axel'd find out). He wasn't really even sure if he was moaning now, just making noise, arching against Axel and begging for him to go faster, he was taking too long--

Axel's hand began to stroke with more vigor- thumb dipping and rubbing against Roxas's slit, precum gathering and moistening his hand to make the task easier. He was rocking his hips into the motion, the fabric of his jeans brushing against the blonde's sac at the same time that his hand gave a particularly rough pull. Axel's mouth was latched onto Roxas's collarbone, sucking harshly. With his one extra hand, the redhead began to fumble with his jeans, attempting to undo the suddenly very stubborn button.

Squinting his eyes open to look down at what was happening between them, Roxas saw that Axel was struggling with his own pants, and he desperately wanted to go down there and help him, but his fingers were still clutching tightly to the man's shoulders, unable to move, little "Aahn"s jerking out of him every few seconds with his friend's actions. He was _so close_ and he moaned into Axel's ear, begging him to hurry up, to finish it, but he didn't respond fast enough and breathing heavily against the redhead's ear he gasped out, fingers tightening further on the boy's shoulders as he spoke, "Please, Axel, fuck me."

Axel's mind shut down for a total of two seconds- his hand freezing and grip tightening on Roxas's cock as those words sunk in. Roxas _never_ cursed-- at least, not when he was in his right mind. That in itself was enough to make Axel pull his head back, his eyes wide. "I… Roxas, no- I can't... Roxas you're drugged... I can't-" He winced as Roxas's fingers tightened around his arms, loosening his grip on the blonde boy's aching member, fingers stroking along it un-intentionally as his hand began to pull back.

Letting out a mixed cry, Roxas pushed his forehead in against Axel's collarbone, and bottom half spasming, Axel had pulled his hand away at the worst possible time- but really, it was too late now. Roxas came hard, and Axel's eyes dilated as Roxas arched, an erotic cry escaping the writhing mass beneath him as the blonde spilled himself all over Axel's hand and his own taut stomach. The blonde's cry quickly became higher and more breathy before stopping completely as he flopped back against the bed, panting heavily, fingers slowly releasing Axel's shoulders before his wrists fell back to the bed, pulse racing, gaze unfocused.

Axel swallowed thickly, letting out a gasping breath and pulling his hand away. Just watching Roxas come had left Axel needing release so badly. He leaned down, pressing a plethora of insistent kisses against Roxas's lax mouth. "I'm sorry- Roxas. I want to, but I can't." He muttered, making sure to leave his soiled hand hovering in the air and away from either of them.

His jade eyes searched the room for a moment, pressing one lingering kiss to Roxas's mouth before getting up to clean his hand off on an old, dirty shirt of his. Whining as Axel left him, a draft attacked Roxas's naked body as he laid there, the after-release haze drifting about him, making him weak and breathy. Axel returned to the bed, though it was a bit of an awkward walk because of his unfinished problem, and moved to lie next to Roxas, sliding thin arms around an equally thin body and tug Roxas's limp body flush against his own, wincing when the blonde's leg brushed against his crotch. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done any of that."

The temporary cold woke Roxas up a bit, and when Axel returned, it took him a moment to squirm closer to the college student, clutching at him, feeling a slicking sensation as the semen on this stomach rubbed up against Axel's bare abdomen. He could feel Axel's protruding erection against his thigh, and as the feeling returned to his arms he slid his hands down, making movements to unbutton his jeans.

It took Axel a few second to realize what Roxas was doing, and he placed one hand on top of the blonde's, stilling his movements by holding his wrist. "It's... it's fine Roxas- you don't have to." He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly and closing his eyes. Oh- he wanted release, but it wasn't necessary. "It'll go away in a little while."

Clenching his jaw, Roxas looked up and gave Axel a defiant stare- one of the first times he had made eye contact with him in the past hour, "I **want** to."

Axel paused for a moment, searching those gorgeous azure eyes for a moment. "Are you sure?" He whispered, "Don't feel like you need to... "

Looking away, Roxas's words were bolder than ever- his demeanor was completely different than usual, "Well, if you won't fuck me, then I'll have to help you this way-" with a rough tug of his hand, Axel's pants were undone, and Roxas was sliding downwards- it seemed that what he had in mind most definitely _did not_ involve his hands.

Realizing that Roxas's intentions, Axel's hands shot out to stop the blonde boy's descent. "N-no! No, it's fine, Roxas. I'll just go to the bathroom." Axel reassured, bringing Roxas's head back up to run one hand through disheveled blonde locks. He placed a slow, lingering kiss onto Roxas's nearly-pouting lips and pulled back. "I'll be back soon." He murmured, sliding off the bed and stumbling out of the room and into the bathroom down the hall, clicking on the lights as he went.

Whimpering as Axel left the room, Roxas curled up on the bed, hugging himself tightly, missing Axel's hands, his mouth. He wanted so bad to please him, but the college student wouldn't let him._ Why not?!_

Axel returned soon enough, looking a bit relieved and far less strained than he had in his initial exit. In his hand was a moist washcloth. He approached the bed, placing a hand on Roxas's shoulder and then turning the blonde over to wipe gently at his lower stomach, cleaning off any evidence of their previous activities. He tossed the cloth off to the side, watching it land on his dirty shirt.

"I'll let you wear an extra pair of my pajamas, alright Roxas?" Axel asked softly, his lips pressing against the smaller male's temple before he stepped back to retrieve a pair of pants that were too short for him now. He tossed them onto Roxas's legs and then turned around, allowing the blonde privacy as he went off in search of pants for himself, changing into them with his back facing Roxas.

Picking up the bottoms from Axel, Roxas's eyes trailed over his boxers, which were still sitting around his thighs, and then down to the rest of his naked body. Something inside him made him stare, almost in disbelief, but that feeling was strangled quickly, that boldness still there, suffocating who he really was.

"It's too hot," he replied, shamelessly watching Axel get changed.

Axel tied the string of his pants and turned around to see Roxas lying just as he had before, his privates as visible as day. He flushed, almost turning away again. "Alright- but ... at least put your boxers back on- please." He realized that the drugs were most likely still in effect. He wouldn't be surprised if they were supposed to last hours on end to give the person who'd drugged their victim a wild night.

He bit his lip, brows furrowing at the thought of such a thing happening to Roxas. He himself, had almost given into that primal urge- what if he had, and they woke up, and it turned out everything Roxas had said was a lie- that Axel had raped him... He couldn't stand that thought.

Roxas gave Axel a long, hurt stare, before slipping to the side of the bed, standing and bending down to pull his boxers from his thighs and off completely. They were slick with precum and wouldn't be especially nice to put back on. He stood there for a moment, boxers in hand, before dropping them to the side as he bent back over, picking up the clothing Axel had given him. Silently, he tugged the pajama bottoms back on, almost as if to spite Axel, refusing to meet those green eyes now.

Axel felt guilt nag at him and he stepped forward to bend down and wrap Roxas in a large, tight embrace. "I'm sorry, Rox- but I couldn't bear it if you woke up and this was all one big mistake. You'll see, it'll be different in the morning." He muttered into Roxas's golden locks of hair, giving the smaller male a tight squeeze.

"But-" Roxas cut himself off, feeling tears sting at his eyes. Because he was frustrated? Because he didn't get his way? Or because of what happened? Because he had changed his relationship with Axel permanently, and he didn't know if this change was going to be good or not? He clenched his fists at his sides, not returning the embrace, but not rejecting it either. His mind was at a mental standstill, and he couldn't tell which Roxas was taking over right now. He didn't know what was happening. Why it was happening. And so he stood there, shoulders shaking as his fingernails bit into his palms.

Axel let out a low, long sigh, releasing the blonde to crouch down and lift Roxas up with one hand under his knees and the other around his shoulders. Standing up straight, Axel carried the distraught teen back to the bed, placing him down gently and climbing in beside him. "It'll be better- you'll see, Roxas." He reached over to turn off the lamp next to his bed that he'd left on earlier, and then pulled the comforter over the both of them and grasped onto Roxas, holding him tight and practically cuddling the blonde's small body into his long, thin one.

The blonde couldn't tell if Axel had done it intentionally, but Roxas's wrists were pinned in between their two chests- if they hadn't, they would be roaming all over his friend, begging for more of what they had been doing earlier. But instead he was being held in this tight embrace, and he bowed his head, only able to interpret Axel's actions in one way right now, as his mind was so fogged with lust.

_Axel didn't want him. _

Tensing, he stayed stock still against Axel, silent- eventually he squeezed his eyes shut, as it hurt too much to look into the darkness that could barely be recognized as his friend's chest.

He slipped into a dreamless sleep, his only way to escape his thoughts.

-----------

Axel stirred awake the next morning with a small groan, his eyes cracking open to stare at the empty space beside him as the events of last night began to replay in his head.

"Fuck," He hissed, sitting up straight and whipping his head about to see that Roxas was nowhere in sight. He panicked just the slightest bit, hopping out of bed and calling out the blonde's name before making his way out of his room and down the hall, peering into the living room before turning to check the bathroom.

The sound of the running shower reached Axel's ears and he raised a hand to knock. "Roxas? Are... are you okay?"

"Y-yeah. I think so," his voice was hesitant, almost shy- normal, "do you need something?"

Axel thought for a moment, before he spoke up, his palm against the door, and his forehead resting against the wooden surface. "I need to know- if you remembered last night. Do you remember what happened?"

Blue eyes narrowed as the cold jet of the shower rained down on his head, and his fingers lifted to the large hickey that flowered across his neck. He sat in the bottom of the bath and he hugged his knees with his other arm, and his thoughts trailed back to his boxers which he found on the floor, in a pile with the rest of his and Axel's clothing- there were stains he recognized all too well in his underwear, and he really couldn't remember how they had gotten there...

"I... I'm not sure. I'm really confused," his voice was getting quieter, threatening to be drowned out by the shower.

Axel's fingers curled against the doorway. "You went to the party- and someone gave you a drink. You didn't know it, but they put some kind of drug in it." He began, wanting to open the door just to make sure that Roxas really was alright.

"He tried to... he tried to rape you- at Dem's party. I don't know what would have happened if I hadn't shown up when I did... I brought you here- but... the drugs were already kicking in," he stopped, taking a deep breath as his heart throbbed painfully in a mixture of guilt and anticipation, "I'm so sorry... We didn't... we didn't have sex- but... I couldn't help myself, Rox- I'm so fucking sorry." He broke off, snapping his mouth shut for a moment and swallowing thickly. "I'm telling the truth when I say we didn't go past the hand job I gave you- hell... you wanted... you'd wanted to give me head- and I wouldn't let you. Please believe me."

Roxas dropped his hand to the floor of the bath, trailing his finger in the water, listening to Axel as he spoke. He blushed furiously when he heard what they had gotten up to- and then blushed harder when he realized that his secret- that he had been crushing on his best friend for the past year- was out.

"...stop talking to the door. Come talk to me," he spoke quietly, watching the door.

Axel nodded, but then realized that Roxas couldn't see him. "Alright..." He twisted the knob, opening the door and entering, his eyes filled with guilt. He stood by the door, his back against it and one hand on the knob in case Roxas wanted him to leave again. "It's not a lie, honest, Roxas." He said, hoping that the blonde didn't plan on throwing any hidden knives at him, or possibly wanting to tell Axel to his face that Roxas hated him and never wanted to see him again.

"I know you're not lying," he looked to Axel, clear blue eyes meeting piercing green, and he brought his hand from the water up to the taps, shutting the water off, before resting his hand back on his knee, looking to Axel, "I'm not mad... just... come here, okay?"

Axel's body slowly moved into action, taking slow steps towards the tub until he knelt down beside it, resting his arms on the side of it and watching Roxas with furrowed brows. "I'm sorry, Rox... if you want me to take you home, I will."

The blonde shook his head, turning to look his friend in the eyes.

"Last night... I told you then?"

Axel froze, but nodded. "You said that you wished what he'd done to you- that it was me..." he muttered, his heart beating painfully against his ribcage. Was Roxas going to take back his words? To apologize, say it was a lie? His fingers clenched themselves and he watched the blonde in anticipation.

Blushing brightly, Roxas looked away, embarrassed, "That's... well..." he swallowed, fingers clenching on his knees as water dripped from his hair and bare shoulders, and he looked back to Axel, determined to meet his gaze, "For the past year- that's how I've felt about you," he looked away immediately after he said it, heart thundering in his chest.

Axel couldn't help but break into the brightest grin yet, reaching out one hand to run it through Roxas's damp hair. "Really?" He asked softly, his wet fingers trailing down to lift Roxas's head and turn it back to face him, "because for the past _five_ years, I've been in love with you."

Roxas's breath caught in his throat, and he stared at Axel with wide eyes- "L-lo--" his heart was in his throat, pulse racing, and then suddenly his shock turned into one of the brightest smiles he had ever adorned in his life. He caught Axel's fingers from his chin, holding them between his two hands.

"I'm really happy," he said quietly, giving Axel's hand a squeeze.

Axel returned the smile tenfold, and leaned forward to give Roxas a chaste peck on the lips. "Me too," he paused for a moment, flushing before speaking up, "D'you want some help washing your hair and back?"

Roxas flushed brightly at the small kiss, and released Axel's hand, hiding his face behind his hands as he curled back up against his knees again. He paused after Axel's offer, considering it.

"I suppose I _did_ forget to wash my hair when I was showering..." he blushed brightly, reaching forward and adjusting the taps- they were different from his ones at home, but he spent so much time at Axel's he knew how to work everything there.

"Alright," he looked back to Axel, as warm water started to gush and fill up the bath, tingling his cold feet and bottom, "But don't get any ideas!"

Axel smiled, "Wouldn't dream of it," he stood, shucking his pants and then stepping in behind the blonde, pushing Roxas's body forward a bit so that he could sit behind him, his long legs bent on either side of the smaller male's body. Axel couldn't help it, and he wrapped his arms around Roxas's chest, tugging him into a hug and nuzzling at his companion's neck.

His stomach squirmed happily and Roxas blushed as he was pulled back into an embrace. As Axel nuzzled his neck, he could feel a slight discomfort there, and he remembered the hickey.

"You left that, right?" he realized Axel couldn't read his mind, and elaborated, "The mark on my neck."

"Uh... yeah... sorry," He muttered against Roxas's throat, grinning despite himself. "I got a little carried away." His voice was sheepish, but he didn't pull away just yet. He was still too elated that Roxas basically felt the same about him to do anything other than hold the blonde tightly to himself.

"We really got carried away, huh?" he leaned back into the embrace, resting his head on Axel's shoulder, gaze drifting up to the ceiling. Now, whenever he had his dreams about Axel, he would wake up wondering if the content had actually been factual memories. Lifting his hand from the water, he searched out Axel's and held it gently.

Axel's lips landed a gentle kiss to Roxas's neck. "Yeah- but anyone could get carried away around you, Rox. It took everything I had not to hug you like this whenever I wanted," He squeezed the blonde's hand reassuringly, landing another soft kiss- this time right on top of the hickey he'd given the blonde last night.

Blushing brightly at Axel's ministrations, Roxas brought a hand down, clapping it against the water and sending a splash up to Axel, "I said don't get any ideas!"

Sighing gently, he trailed his fingers through the water, "I know that we did a lot of stuff last night, but- I don't remember any of it. So... when you kiss me, it's like having my first kiss... okay? It's like starting over, even though I know it's not like that for you."

Axel paused, pulling his mouth away from Roxas's neck and removing his arms from around the blonde. "Sorry- I didn't think about it like that." He murmured, suddenly feeling ashamed of himself. He reached out for the shampoo bottle resting on the side of the tub and squirted some into his hands before bringing them to Roxas's head and lathering gently, almost like a massage to the blonde's scalp.

"It's alright," fighting down a blush, Roxas stared at his knees through the water, "I'm... I'm flattered, I suppose... that anyone, especially _you_- would think about me like that."

Axel couldn't help but chuckle, his fingers rubbing gently into Roxas's hair, "That's an understatement. How could I not, Roxas? You're everything anyone would want in a guy," He leaned forward to place a gentle kiss to the shell of Roxas's ear, "Including me." He reached around Roxas to turn on the showerhead before moving to close the curtain as water rained down on both of them.

Roxas couldn't reply as water and shampoo washed down his face- but he didn't know what to say to Axel, anyway. He decided to just accept Axel's excuse, even if he didn't understand it. He simply sat and enjoyed the attention, thinking about what had happened and what will happen...

"Oh god," Roxas blanched.

"Is something wrong, Roxas?" Axel asked, his fingers running through the younger teen's hair to rinse out the shampoo.

"My neck. School on Monday. _Oh god_," despite his overwhelming happiness of being with Axel, right now he really wanted to curl up and bury himself under a rock in the highlands of some far away country.

Axel laughed softly. "Turtlenecks or some concealer can do wonders, Roxas... or..." He paused, his hands resting in tufts of golden hair, "you could tell them that you got it from your boyfriend."

He flushed, "Y-yeah," he decided not to be specific about what he'd do. He had no clue, really. It was the middle of summer- he couldn't wear a turtle neck. He had no concealer, and even if he did, he didn't know how to use it. And to announce to the school that he was gay... with a college freshman, at that...

Reaching up, he clasped Axel's hand firmly, "I don't care what people say," he murmured quietly, "You're my best friend- always have been. That's not going to change."

"Best friend-... right." Axel's hands fell from Roxas's hair as the last of the soap was rinsed free. He had no right to be bitter- he knew that... but it hurt to know that Roxas still didn't want to be more- even though he'd accepted the redhead's feelings- and basically felt a fraction of the same. He felt something painful inside of him, which made his hands and chest ache and his eyes burn. He let out a soft, barely audible sigh, and rested his forehead against the back of Roxas's neck.

Roxas noticed the change in Axel's mood, and he squeezed his hand, "Hey- don't take that the wrong way!!" he reddened, turning around in the water, facing him and taking in his shot-down expression, "You're still my best friend, but you're also something... more. My..." he blushed violently, but knew he needed to get the words out to cheer up the redhead, "My boyfriend. You're my boyfriend _and_ my best friend. Not just one or the other."

Relief flooded into Axel's lungs and he let out a breath of air, smiling at Roxas. "You had me worried there for a second," he said softly, reaching out a hand to pull Roxas's face forward and land a kiss to the blonde's cheek. "Now- lets get dried off, yeah?"

As he pulled away, the blonde darted back in, landing a small kiss on the older male's cheek, before clambering out of the bath, facing the wall as he grabbed a towel and pulled it around his waist, red staining his cheeks. Axel's insecurity was cute, and impulse took over, and... he just wanted to. So he did. He knew he was probably encouraging Axel far too much though.

Axel put on his own towel, ruffling Roxas's hair as he walked past the blonde and back to his room to get dressed. "Hurry up already, Roxas!" He called back, tease in his voice. Roxas appeared behind him soon enough and the two dressed in silence. Axel grabbed his keys, eyeing Roxas in a pair of his old jeans and t-shirt, and grinned, outstretching his hand. "Let's go to the mall."

"The mall?" Roxas hesitated, looking from Axel's outstretched hand, up to his hopeful face, "Is this... a date?"

Axel grinned. "If that's what you want it to be, sure." He couldn't help but pray to every god out there that Roxas didn't reject his offer.

Biting his lip, Roxas looked up to Axel, giving him a determined gaze, before reaching out and taking his hand.

"Of course I do."

"Me too," Axel interlaced their fingers, bringing the blonde up beside them as they left the apartment, hand in hand.

* * *

**MEANWHILE!

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Demyx shot up in bed, eyes wide. However, two sets of arms, both slung around his stomach, forcefully pulled him back down and he let out a cry of shock. To his right, his neck was tickled when someone pressed their face against his collarbone, kissing the soft skin there gently.

"Go back to sleep, Demyx," Zexion murmured. To his left, a strong arm held him tightly and a set of lips pressed against his shoulder.

"The shrimp's right, Dem. It's too early to be freaking out yet," Xigbar's gruff voice muttered. Demyx paused for a moment, and then let out a sigh of exasperation as he allowed the two other men to cuddle against his body. He suddenly couldn't help the smile that crept onto his face, and closed his eyes.

* * *

**END. YA RLY**

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**Disclaimer:** We don't own ANYTHING belonging to Kingdom Hearts or Squeenix. D:

**Psycho Rooster:** Besides mentioning that this is like a sequel to Windowsill...I have nothing to say. My brain died. DX AND WE CALL IT XIGDEXION

**YukaYuka**: To all those who are like "omg why have you not update RE?" well.. -points an accusing finger at PR-

**Psycho Rooster:** -flail- I take the blame. You guys will have to wait at least another week or two because of my incompotence. -completely scrapped the original chapter and is forcing Yuka to help her rewrite it-


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